January 3rd, 20082007 …And Then It Got Worse
A year ago I made a blog entry on my old Windows Live Spaces blog about how horrible 2006 was. I said something about how I don’t think things could get any worse, and that I was going to make positive changes to my life in 2007.
Well as the title of this entry suggests, things got worse, much much worse. Also I didn’t make any positive changes, even though I did try repeatedly. Every time I thought I was making a change for the better, I’d hit a wall or go in circles, and end up right where I started.
I lost the most important person in my life. I lost my best friend. I lost another best friend and the person I’ve known longest in my life, besides my family.
I met someone really cool who I thought I had a lot in common with and might finally snap me out of all the horrible shit that’s gone on in my life over the past couple of years, but he ended up causing me more hurt.
I really have to start to wonder, “What did I do to deserve this life?” I think everyone asks that question to themselves at some point during their life. Probably in times of distress, or when going through pain. But seriously, every time I think I’ve found happiness, I end up being hurt worse than I have ever been. How much pain can a person endure? How many times do I have to be hurt until my heart just explodes from the pain?
Already some of the shit from 2007 has carried over into 2008, but I have stopped it dead in it’s tracks. I was not going to start this year off on the wrong foot. This time things will be different and better. If even just a bit better than last year, at least it would be an improvement. I think this is going to be a challenging and scary year for me.
Ready or not, here I come.









I think that’s a good call. I too stopped somethings dead in their tracks that were about to be carried over from 2007.
I’ve so totally been brought to my knees on many occasions from the insane intensity of the pain that I felt from someone. In the end, I just couldn’t keep waiting to see what else would happen and how badly I could feel.
I think you’re better off for stopping things in their tracks.
This year will be a challenging one but I also think personally rewarding.
There’s much to see and do.
I have a feeling you’re right about this year. It’s time to get on with life I think and see what else life has in store for me.